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Monday, October 27, 2008

Manifesto: Part I - Shot Across The Bow

If I were a girl I'd be pregnant with eight kids by now. That's the conclusion that we came up with as we travelled to Melbourne for a relaxing weekend. Why would I pregnant? Because I can't say no to anyone. That's about to change...

What's wrong with this picture? We travel over 1,600 kilometers just to get away from things and relax. We can't relax here, it's impossible. Why can't we relax? Because people want a piece of me.

I'm not complaining, although it might appear that way. What I'm doing is diversifying. Over the past few months my work loads have increased out of sight. I'm taking on far too much at my day job, which is one of the more high pressured jobs that anyone should do, and I'm taking on more than I can handle outside of those hours. I have no time for my family, or me. My mental health has suffered. My physical health has also suffered. Right now I can barely walk, such is the tightness and pain in my back. For a few hours there it looked like I'd have to remain stuck in Melbourne while I sought treatment, but such is the power of Neurofen and my own stubborn nature that I managed to share the driving back and did my four and half hours out of seven driving hours. Once I was in position I was fine, but I can make any sudden moves, and when I say sudden I mean anything that's more sudden than snail pace. I'll be back at the day job tomorrow. Why? Because it pays well, I enjoy it and it can end at the drop of a hat.

We discussed a lot in the car. How to reduce stress. We discussed a lot of people, family, extended family, chums and people who ain't chums. We discussed work. We discussed money. We discussed happiness. We discussed us. And we reached a lot of conclusions. People need to read this and accept it as it's being said - this isn't a definite 'piss off', however I'm cutting my work load back by a lot.

I'm not accepting any and every offer that comes along, and hey - it's not like I'm being paid for what I do outside of the day job. I love to write and I'd write all day, every day, if I had the chance. However of late I've not been able to write as much about things I enjoy or want to write about. So if you're thinking of approaching me with an idea then by all means - do so. I'll listen and I'll consider it. I'll probably accept it, but don't be bent out of shape if I don't. If I'm already working for you on a handshake deal then I'll do my best to finish the job and we'll move from there. And frankly handshake deals are all I get these days. If you want a concrete deal then put it in writing, I'll look at it and see where we go. I'm not going to hit people up for payment. I like working on some web-sites (others I'm going to cut back and even stop working on) and those people know who they are and for those - I don't want you to pay me. If I've said I'm happy to do something for free then that still applies. The little goodies that sometimes turn up are reward enough for me, knowing that people are earning an income (no matter how small) from sites I've set up is a bonus and that's the pay off for me, so fret not. Sites will not vanish, indeed I'll be working on some sites even more over the coming weeks.

I need to get my correspondence back on track. I've been too lax and some good friendships have suffered and may already be beyond repair. To those people I've ignored of late accept my apologies. I'll be emailing soon to see what I can do to salvage those friendships. If they fall by the wayside then so be it. I'll deal with it. I'll be damn sad, but life will move on.

I'm not accepting every invite that I'm offered. I'm not about to become a recluse, just a bit more picky. There's some reasons for this and I'm happy to discuss them in private if need be - some laundry doesn't need public airing.

I'm done being ripped off. If you're one of those fine bastards that's ripped me off, or is in the process of bad mouthing me consider this fair warning - I'll start replying. You know who you are. A few so called writers and interviewers with high opinions of yourselves. Here's a hint for one of those guys - you're not held in as high esteem as you think, or like to tell others you are. In fact most professionals view you as an annoyance and an untalented one at that. Perhaps it's your insistence of telling people how old time artists are mentally ill recluses who will only speak to you and how anyone else who writes or interviews someone you've once spoken to has ripped off your work. Word gets back pal. Now this also extends to the publishers known as A First Salvo. You owe some cash, but not to me, so fucking pay the artist in question now or the next time you visit this blog it'll all be out there in the open. Actually, you know, fuck it, I'll place it out there in the open very shortly anyway. You've not done the right thing by me - hey, in the publishing world you're not alone there when it comes to shitting on me - but I can live with that. You've done the wrong thing by a pal of mine and you've got a few hours to correct that or the can of worms will be cracked open.

If you're one of those fucking lunatics who keep sending me spam or threatening messages, emails or the like - give up now. It'll all be forwarded on to the relevant authorities. Even better, it'll also be posted here. If you post crap on a forum and I don't respond then don't get all excited and tell people how you've beaten me and you've won - it really means you're not worth replying to because you're a simpleton. Got it? Good.

If you think I owe you something then let me know. I'm betting that I don't. For those I do owe - and you know who you are - sadly some deals are going to be canceled, much to my dismay. If I begun paying you then I'll pay you out, hopefully sooner as opposed to later, and then I'll reassess things.

Oddly enough my mental health has improved by leaps and bounds. I'm not depressed anymore, I'm actually feeling quite happy.

If you're amongst my close circle, remember - we love you loads and want to see as much, if not more, of you. Watch this space. I wanna have some fun again.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I stand with you. Good friend and even better writer.

SB